My list of new school year completely unrealistic goals

School starts in a week so it is about time I start making my “new school year completely unrealistic goals”.

1. I will make my kids a warm breakfast every morning.
2. I will find educational moments in all we do.
3. I will make sure they practice the piano 20 minutes every day.
4. I will make a warm dinner every night.
5. I will not go to McDonald’s.
6. I will get to know the names of every one of my kids’ classmates and invite them over regularly for playdates so that my children will grow up socially unawkward.
7. I will volunteer every week.
8. The house will always be clean because the kids will be gone.
9. The laundry will be caught up.
10. I will exercise every day and eat healthy.
11. I will not eat chocolate constantly after 3pm when they are all home with a slight increase once husband comes home too.
12. My children will jump in the shower each morning excited to start the day.
13. My children’s hair will be combed every morning.
14. My children’s clothes will match every day.
15. My children will turn in library books on time.

I think that is enough.  I mean, I don’t want my readers to feel bad about not being able to do all of these things perfectly without a slight addiction to vodka.