This Friday is Black Friday. I now join my friend Hollie and her family on this sacred of holidays. It’s tradition. This is the second year in a row.
I recently found out that Hollie used to be an expert MAC cosmetics artist. I think this is what they’re called. I’m not completely sure. What I am sure about is the fact that Black Friday would be the perfect time for her to give me a makeover while we’re standing in line in 30 degree weather waiting for Target to open.
She recommended a party bus. Party buses remind me of bachelorette parties. There is no reason for this. I’ve never been to one on a party bus. I’ve never actually been on a party bus. But whenever they’re used on TV, they’re used for bachelorette parties. So I said we should get a Chippendale for Black Friday. But Chippendales creep her out. I think it’s the stretchy pants. But I see him more as someone who just sits there quietly because he comes with the bus. You know. With the neon twinkle lights.
Instead, we’re going to try and find the guys who sold hot chocolate to people in line last year. We saw them at two different stores. I have a feeling they funded a semester from this one night of sales.
Maybe they could fund two if they wore stretchy pants.