Tag Archives: Barry Manilow

Headaches and White Powder

I had a migraine.

I wasn’t supposed to.

I just had a nice new dose of Botox to freeze my brain.

I can’t feel my forehead so I shouldn’t have headaches.  But as I was lying on a yoga mat, trying to straighten my leg without falling over, my vision went funny.  I ignored it until there was no denying what was happening. I dug through my purse looking for my migraine meds as I hurried to my car.

I hadn’t had a migraine for a year or so and the pill in my purse was old.  Very old.

I peeled open the aluminum packaging and the pill crumbled to a powder.

Now migraines make me a bit loopy.  The pain was already starting and I knew it was going to be bad.  So I stood on the street, in front of a local distillery, licking white powder off of my hands like a mad woman.

I looked up, saw the distillery, and for a split second I wanted to yell: “I have a migraine” just in case anyone was watching my intense drug-seeking actions.  But the pain was building.  I realized I didn’t care and hurried home.

However.

I decided that in case someone did see me and that person happens upon this blog, I want you to know:

I may have ingested as much of that white powder as I could,

But I never inhaled.

Baseball caps help keep out the pain.  And this one helps me be full of glee.

Baseball caps help keep out the pain. And this one helps me be full of glee.

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The Universe and Manilow

I’m worried about Barry Manilow.  I think karma may get him.  I’m waiting to hear.

Last time I mentioned a writing retreat I went to.  It was Thursday to Saturday.  I was pretty much in a class or discussing writing.  My friend called me and told me she had 2 free tickets to Barry Manilow.  I had an appointment I was able to switch so I could make it to the concert.  So I just happened to be in the state on the night Barry would be performing; I had free tickets and I was able to go.

I WAS MEANT TO GO.

So I got in my car and started driving.  It was about an hour drive to the stadium.  I was ten minutes away.  I was making good time.  I was pretending my name was Mandy when my friend texted:

Manilow cancelled.

HE CANCELLED. Five minutes before the doors were to open and he cancelled.

The universe had symbiotically come together to allow me to go to Barry. THE UNIVERSE wanted me to go to Barry Manilow.

And he cancelled.  I’m worried what the universe might do.

I own this but I don't have a matching boa and now I never will.

I own this but I don’t have a matching boa and now I never will.

What I had planned in Vegas

I was supposed to go to Vegas tomorrow, but sometimes what happens in Vegas shouldn’t include me.  It’s too bad, though.  I had great plans.

Due to the fact I have had four tap lessons, I was going to try out as a Show Girl.  My teacher told me to go for it, but that they probably won’t count with me as I dance like he does.  So I have been practicing tapping while counting in my head.  I do ok until I try to turn.

Kevin and I were going to Barry Manilow together Sunday night.  I was really looking forward to a spiritually fulfilling Sunday, but I guess I will just go to church instead.

Kevin is still going to Vegas, but I’m not sure he will go to Barry alone.  I’m not sure I want him to.  I was really hoping to stalk Barry this time.  Any time I try to stalk people, I fail.  I think I lack dedication.  After watching Extreme Couponing, I feel like I definitely lack dedication to saving money while buying 100 gallons of shampoo.  I really wish I had a friend who was an extreme couponer.  I would like to go shopping with her once, but after four hours I would leave.  (One shopping trip I watched was 10 hours) I already mentioned I lack dedication.

I think I will just buy a sequenced Manilow baseball cap online – the one I have is kind of dirty.

image from starz.bz $29.99 in case you were wondering

Bieber Bi-polar Disorder

(There will be no picture today because I am afraid if I have a picture of JB, I will get hate mail from teenage girls for what I am about to write.)

I have a confession.  At least it feels like a confession and I would really appreciate it if we kept it to the world wide web.  You know, for privacy reasons.

I watched the Justin Bieber movie.  I was incredibly curious. (For full disclosure, I did the same thing with High School Musical.  I told people I watched it with my kids but my kids were 4 and 1 at the time.)  This time I watched it to make sure it was appropriate for the office.  Sometimes G movies try to slip in a couple expletives.  (I’m sticking with this story.)  I watched it while playing Legos with my sons. My daughter, hallelujah, was not interested.  The movie made me think I should take more videos of my kids in case they become famous and a biographical film is made about them at the age of 16.

I had mixed emotions.  And I believe I am embarrassed by both.

Emotion #1: I cried.  Now to be fair, I did not cry in the way that the fourteen year old girls were crying.  I did not start screaming JB’s name and clawing my television screen.  No.  I became emotional when his manager and mom gave away tickets to girls who didn’t have any.  One family got scammed on Craig’s List.  Another got ditched by a friend.  And another waited in line but was too late.  So these sad pathetic preteens were just hanging out with homemade signs and dreams of being discovered by JB even though the lights are so bright he can’t actually see the audience (I understand this because I feel this way with Barry Manilow).  When the girls started to cry and jump around, it made me happy.  I could imagine that happening to my kid and just being really grateful.  So I cried.  I am woman enough to admit it.

Emotion #2: perturbation  During One Less Lonely Girl, JB has a girl come out of the audience and he sings to her WHICH IS A TOTAL RIP OFF OF BARRY MANILOW taking a girl out of the audience and singing I can’t Sing Without You.  He now dances with a lady.  I’m pretty sure he was the first to do this just because of how old he is.    Watching JB also made me a little uncomfortable because he looks so young and I felt like I was watching a criminal act, seeing him flirt.  He really does look 12 and I’m not sure that is old enough to be flirting.

Emotionally, this was a very tiring film for me.  And now I know the words to three of his songs.  My day was full.